I finally got to watch Extremely loud & Incredibly close today, I had seen bits and pieces of it. I am not going to talk about the movie as I don't like giving movies away.. however I want to talk about the character Oskar in the movie.
Oskar is a relatable character for me. My mother had seen the movie and told me several days ago that I would like it and that I would see myself in Oskar.
Oskar is very much like myself. I adore his character. Oskar mentions he was tested for asperger's but the tests we inconclusive. However that does not mean he's not on the autism spectrum. He very much is. Not all people on the autism spectrum are the same. Oscar is very much in his own world.. yet he spends the entire movie learning to navigate the world around him.
At the beginning of the film He says his dad designed his expeditions so he would have to talk to people. This is probably due to the fact that people like Oskar have a hard time communicating with others, it causes anxiety and it's easier to avoid social situations. These expeditions forces him to communicate with others, which is very therapeutic. Speaking verbally is hard for me, so I understood that. I can sit in a room full of people, or even one on one and not say a word, or only just answer quick questions. Having a real conversation is something I just cannot really do.
Oskar is afraid of everything, very much like myself.. his fears are different from mine. However I could understand him when he explained how things made him feel. However with me I cannot seem to overcome mine. No amount of CBT has helped.We have since learned I have a horrible inner ear vestibular disorder that causes a lot of fears because my body cannot judge where I am in space..so therefore I panic in situations where there's large open spaces like streets or large pictures, things or murals.
Oskar's sensitivity to noise and his covering his ears brought back a lot of memories of my sensitivity to sounds. I spent a lot of time as a little kid with my hands over my ears or in my ears.. yes I have a profound hearing loss, and yet still very sensitive to sounds. we do not know how that works. but just because I am sensitive to sounds does not mean i understand what people say when they speak. it's really odd.
Oskar uses a tambourine to calm him.. Anxiety is very common, I live with it. I am not sure what I do to calm myself, however I do know I like familiar things and people, familiar voices as well as music. I also use a 15lb weighted blanket, a 5lbs weighted belt and a 8lb weighted vest.
There's other things that I relate to.. if you have not seen the movie I recommend it, those of you who know me will probably see me in the character of Oskar
