Excellent is all I have to say about this video!!
This video is one that I can relate to. I am constantly doing what she suggests. I personally do not care what others think of me when I do something that brings me a lot of happiness. I do get excited easily over the little things in life that others do not. The last 5 years life has been hard for my family with my grandma's illness and I have to find the joy in life cause it's not here around my house. Joy is easy for me to find.. however freedom is not. It's rare.
In December I was able to go to Long Beach and rent a bike and ride along the harbor across from the Queen Mary. It was something that I wanted to do for a year and a half. I finally just did it while my mom and aunt went out to lunch, I tagged along for the ride, it was Christmas vacation and everyone was home at the same time, so we got a caregiver and we went out.... it was a much needed time. As my grandma gets worse and sicker, I have been thinking I need another day like this. When I am having fun and enjoying life, I notice that my eating disorder behaviors and obsessions leave for a while. I am then able to face the days that come after a lot better.
For the past year or so my mom has been promising me a day out once a month, but it's not been happening. Kati's video made me think of the things I would like to do. I'd love to spend a day with no time limit, no rush to get back to care for my grandma and go to the Grove and go shopping or go to Hermosa Beach with my bike...the thing that makes me happiest is when there's no time limit, No phone calls calling us to have us come back home, cutting our day out short. I miss being able to spend time with my mom.
When Kati says "our eating disorders don't just come out of no where, we create them to protect us from unwelcome emotions, unwelcome experiences....(etc)..." This totally goes along with what I read in the book Hollow by Jena Morrow.. where she writes in chapter 20 " ...You have become an expert at distracting yourself to keep from feeling unpleasant emotions. When you are out of the hospital, you distract yourself with starvation and the abuse of your body...." I know I have been doing a lot of this. It's how I survive the day to day stress of whats going on. I'd eventually like to be able to live my life and not have to depend on eating disorder behaviors to help me cope with everything.
You can check out Kati's website and youtube channel
